'Mmnfhmm... be wif' yuu in a minute... finishin' mah' donut... mnfhh...
Aahhh... ~
Okay then! Welcome to the Kuromomo Cafe~'
No matter where you're wandering, it's possible to stumble upon the Kuromomo Cafe. The place never seems to have a set street address, and you might find that going out to a cake shop or pastry place or even a Starbucks, that the Kuromomo Cafe seems to be occupying the building your favorite establishment used to be in! It's always the same place inside, though... with only one employee. Mirufi.
The place is often nicknamed the Ambush Cafe or something similar. Many folks actively seek it out just for this. You never know what's going to happen when you walk in to order coffee or sweets. You might get the best snack you ever had and walk out unharmed. You might get yanked behind the counter and devoured. You might be dunked in pudding. You might be swallowed by a giant creme-filled donut. The possibilities are ridiculous!
Mirufi herself is rather ridiculous as well. Wearing a uniform flat-out stolen from another restaurant chain ("It's the only one I could find to fit me!") this smushy lass is the sole proprieter of the Kuromomo Cafe. She makes the stuff, she sells it, she snacks on it. She snacks on customers. She lets the stuff she makes snack on customers. And she loves her job!
She's a playful little... er... big smush too. Don't expect to get out un-teased, even if you do manage to get out un-devoured!
Aside from her tendencies to devour her customers via her mouth, rump, breasts, tail, hair and nethers... -breathe-
... she also makes a rather mean pastry! And we do mean 'MEAN'. Mirufi's pastries are commonly inflated to ridiculous sizes in order to consume their potential buyers, just for laughs. And then Mirufi eats the pastry and gets the deliciousness of her customer too! Common tricks here include large people-eating creme-filled donuts, vats of pudding-goo monsters, taffy octopi and the ever-popular animate cakes!
So come on in, when you can. Just don't make plans afterwards~